Friday, May 19, 2006

Our fascination with Chasidishe Ausvorfs

Over the last year or so, since the Chasidishe underworld has begun blogging and reading blogs a most peculiar fascination has started. While there are many Jewish blogs from all streams of Judaism that give their unique peek into their life and mindset, that is however not what is getting all of our attention. It is the rebel blogs, the blogs of Upgefurene Chasidishe Bucherim that are getting all of our attention. Are these people being envied by the populace, or is everyone helplessly drawn to them like to a bad car crash?
Further, where are these people coming from? All the hate and rhetoric that these people write on their blog. Why do they have so much anger towards their born-in faith? What has gone wrong? For such anger and contempt to take place there has to be something that has been done wrong to them in their life. Children will generally look up to their parents and teachers to be their role models. When children rebel and refuse to accept and integrate these figures and their messages into their life, something is wrong.
When reading these blogs, interestingly there is a common underlying message. If the anger is stripped away and attention is closely paid to the meta message, it is apparent that what these people seek is acceptance. They were never accepted by their parents and Melamdim for whom they were. They were always tried to be pushed into that mold. That one-size-fits-all mold that is sold in every Yeshivah in Boro-Park and Williamsburg. Does every child really fit the same mold. Can every child really be educated using the same methods. What ever happened to "Chanoich L'nar Al Pi Darkoy"? Of course it's not easy. Who said being a Melamid was meant to be a way of getting out of Kollel and avoiding a job in the outside world? Why are the Melamdim in the Chasidishe Yeshivahs the guys who were never able to do anything else? Why aren't we hiring talented and gifted educaters as our Melamdim, people that actually know how to teach, not just babysit? Is this how much we value the next generation that we are willing to let people who could never sit in one place in Yeshivah for more than five minutes, let alone learn something, educate our children?
Children need more than that and they are worth more than that. There is no way that a child can grow up loving to learn and to love Yiddishkeit when all his Melamid can think of is when he will get his next phone call so that he can leave the class and schmooze. There has to be a standard for Melamdim in the community. What other job would hire a worker who's biggest accomplishment was that he drank 3,657 coffees in a kollel until he was mercifully released from his obligation and was allowed by his wife to become a Melamid. Just like when becoming a real-estate agent there is a New York Sate required course and license, so should there be one for Melamdim. Until we don't want to realize what we are doing wrong and what we are sacrificing here, there will be plenty more Chasidishe blogs popping up. And the Yeshivahs will not waste a second to asser the children from reading them, oblivious to the fact that they are speaking to future blog authors.

excellent. read this weeks guest column on front page of Jewish Press....



for the Lakewood Woman's perspective


Come visit . . .


If you would double space your paragraphs your blog would be an easier read.


So Mr. Chaptzem what happened to you? Are you also blaming all your problems on the yeshivas and melamdim? It's time ppl around here grow up and take blame for their own problems and mistakes!!


Are you jealous that there are other blogs receiving more attention than you?

What makes you think that they are receiving attention at all?

In my experience, most people that go off, do so because they want an excuse to follow their taavos. There are very few of them that can have an educated discussion about why they have gone off.

The fact is we all have taavos. Some of us overcome them, others live a frum life, and unfortunately on occassion give in to their taavos. The others give in to their taavos, and use excuses, primarily blaming their past, to go off the derech and do what they want.

It is unfair to blame their ubringing, because you will see children from families where all the kids are frum but one isn't. If the family was so terrible, there would be more problems.

We need to do a better job in instilling yiddishkeit in the 'HARTZ' so that when faced with Taavos Haolam we will be better equipped to overcome them.


Good points. You just forgot to mention that there are so many Chasideshe bums that it is not a chidush.


There's in no doubt a problem w/our Yeshive system, but the blame can solely put on us(parents), why? good question, I'll explain you why, when it comes to pay tuition, we're all bargaining, instead of understanding the point "you get what you pay for" we're only willing to pay the least(there has be left some dough for our fancy cars) & how do you expect your son's Yeshive to hire professionals with such a poor income? Nevertheless what examples are we setting for our children, we're having the time of our life, w/all the gadgets & SUV's ect. & when you hear your bucher blabbing about all this, you're ready to kill him, "you shouldn't be talking about stuff like this, why aren't you learning now, I'll call your melamid, get the h.. out'o here, go in shul ect." now what do expect from a child that all his father's doing, is being preoccupied w/all his "shtisim" & keeps ranting on him why he's not "Moshe Rabbenu"! so basically it's us(parents) who need to do some major improvements! good shabbes!


Some people just no longer believe in the religion and the way of life. They love their parents and their families but they have made a choice that the way of life is not for them. No blame. Just an informed decision.


You're right on Anon.
Kids are smart enough to smell the hypocrisy.
You can talk to them about the chashuves of torah till you're blue in the face, but they see who really gets all the attention and respect on the street.


As mentioned earlier, when kids see parents living a VERY gashmiyisdika life, they want the same for themselves. The parents have gedoorim to protect themselves from going off completely, but kids do not. They follow their tayvis and then it makes them more and more depressed. Once they are depressed over the terrible things they have done, the Yaytzer Hoorah mishes arayn in such a way that it is very difficult for the kids to extricate themselves from the gutters that they've descended into. To blame the Chinuch system is ridiculous.

Actually, if you take into account the level of gashmiyis in the community, I believe that the Yeshivas are EXTREMELY successful. Why don't you come and visit a Yeshiva bais Medrash and witness the dedication of the boys who are fighting off the gashmiyis and are leading a ruchniyisdika life againgst all odds in this country of "kimaasay eretz mitzrayim oochmaasay eretz kinaan".


just remember the rule

do as i do NOT as i say

kids will know whats feels right and shmeks



Well said!!!


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