Chaptzem Blog!      

This is the first time I post here.
But I really don't see the point of this post. So what you never heard of a Muslim and Jewish partnership big deal.

 

Why cant they just make it a Kosher Dunkin Donuts ?

 

deodorant user.You are an example of those frum men who put down women and view them as second class..

Nothing wrong with a frum business woman. Not all of us are made out to be housewives with 10 kids while the men work and have affairs with thier secretary.

I hate such men like you. Be happy for her and wish her good luck.,

 

Who did her sheitel?

 

this is the nicest news I have read in a long long time. Now if we can all learn to get along, the world will be a better place to live in.

 

she wont be that slim for long!

 

My concern is not over the halachos of doing business with Maacholos Assirois, though that is an issue here, since the issur is puchased intentionally and repetitively.

My main concern is that there is a "raiach" of a relationship between this Heimishe woman and a man who is not her husband.

I could care less if he is a Chassidish Man or an Imam. My concern is that being involved in this type of partnership is NOT the same as a man and women working in an office together both for the same boss.

Here, as "Partners" they are sharing emotions. The emotions of happiness when business decisions they make work out, and emotions of pain when they don't. These emotions, can take 2 people who would never in their wildest dreams consider being "involved" with a member of the opposite gender other than their spouse, and slowly, build emotional ties to each other.

Forget for a moment the issue of Yiddishkeit. A doctor friend of mine now practicing in Alabama told me that in their community it would be considered improper for a man and woman to be in a business partnership with each other (unless they were either both single or married to each other), since it is "inevitable" that emotionally improper bonds to form. In fact it is a common expression that partners become closer that husband & wife.

No matter how much of a tzadeikes this woman is, and I truly am sure she is doing this with NO intention to stray from her husband, ... to be in such a relationship with a man other than her husband, is playing with fire. Being partners, they will be finishing each other's sentences, laughing together, crying together, planning together, .... things that are best to be shared with one's wife or husband.

I know, I would never consider a partnership with a woman other than my wife. I do not consider myself on a high enough madreiga to know for sure that I can insulate myself from unintentional emotional involvement.

I am not talking about its being mutar or ossur. I am talking about taking chances with our emotions, forming bonds with people of other genders. (though I wonder if some rabbonim would have something to say about this)

So, in my humble opinion, if this were a story about a Chassidishe man and a Moslem, I would say it is a Kidush Hashem (other than the kashrus issues already discussed to death here)
But, I do have these concerns about being in such an intimate relationship with a person of the opposite gender.
(Yes, I already said this elsewhere.)

 

Notice that their arms are brushing against each other (in the photo).

 

WOW! They seem to be such a cute couple!

 

"At 20, she was married off to a man of her parents’ choosing"

What's wrong with that? this is the case for 99% of the chasidim & most are happy. Those that choose for themselves (goyim) the divorce rate is 77%. I don't know the statistic for the non chasidim.

 

mr 7:27, you have alot of experience in this field....and from experience I am sure you are correct, unfortunately.

 

11:59

Yes, unfortunately I do have "too much experience."

I owned and operated a company with over many employees. When certain "star" employees would outshine others, I would offer them a sort of "franchise" opportunity. I always put 2 together in each franchise as sort of partners.
They made many decisions together, some right ones that succeeded and from some they had lessons to learn.

They had a sort of autonomy from me, but certain business connections to me, etc.,

We would all meet every week or two, for exchange/balance of inventory, going over books, problem solving, etc. debriefing, and "couseling" sometimes personal would also come into play.

Among these people were people from ALL backgrounds. Yidden from all corners of Yiddishkeit, was well as goyim of all types. Genders split about 50/50. However, ALL responsible people who were worthy of this offer.

Unfortunately, I leaned that more than half the time, in fact close to 90% of the time, when I put a male and female together, no matter how good their marriages were before, the two new "partners" wound up way too close, and often "crossed the line." I would hear this both from the "guilty parties" who came to me crying over their mistakes, indiscretions, and new emotional & other involvements, as well as from spouses who "noticed" things ... like seeing their wives or husbands with their partners made them realize they were growing closer to their partners than to their spouses. This obviously caused much pain.

At first I thought this was a anomaly, and that I had not chosen well. But, eventually I learned to only choose two members of the same gender, or a married couple.

Not a single one of these people to whom I offered these deals were in any way EVER thinking of cheating, physically or emotionally on their spouses. In fact, I chose ones who I thought had really stable marriages. But the events which I described in the above post, put them together too much. Even if their physical time together was not too much, but they were experiencing too many emotional decisions and outcomes together.

I had much teshuva to do for putting these obstacles in these good people's paths. I looked up and found the majority of people whom I had hurt with my policies, and asked them for forgiveness. I never intended to hurt anyone.

I actually believed that a man and a woman can work together and "keep it business." I was wrong.
Once it left the Office or Store setting of many employees working together, and became just those two sharing responsibilities, those responsibilities took on emotions similar to raising children together.

Now, maybe I had a very skewed sampling of the population... or maybe the Yetzer Hora is stronger that we give him credit for.

I changed my policies and the last couple of years only assigned same gender or married couples, no matter who requested whom. I have since sold this enterprise, and told the purchaser to be careful and NEVER put two people together were were married to others.

But I always have to live with the fact that my being so sure that men and woman can "keep it business" cause over a dozen of otherwise good marriage to fail.

I am sorry if some of you disagree with me. The "Me" of 10 years ago disagreed with the "Me" of today to, so I understand.

However, I always had much faith, and still do have much faith in a woman's ability to be a good business person.

I have been very naive and "modern" in my original thoughts.

A funny thing happened when I was visiting Alabama.

I physicial friend of mine phoned me up to meet for lunch with her partner.

I stupidly said, "Huh?" won'd I bee a third wheel?

I was told, "Here in The South, Business Associates, partners, even boss and empolyee, do not go to nice lunches together alone, even to discuss business." They explained that the "Classy people in The South" felt that this form of "Yichud" (not their word) was wrong and "lead to mistakes and events which could cause hurt."

Also, the felt it was disrespectful to the spouse who was not present.

So, I as a friend of this physician was invited to be the Chaperone to this esentially business meetting between 2 physicians.

These two wonderful people were religious people, but not of our faith. They were Southern Baptists. They were goyim practicing hilchos Yichud better that many of us.

 

To November 18, 2007 7:27 PM

Quote: I know, I would never consider a partnership with a woman other than my wife.

That's what they all say.

 

Yo really think she has interest in the guy other than profit??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

 

No, I do not feel she has ANY interest other than profit from a legal business. God forbid would I think she is entering into this with inappropriate motivation or intent.

I was ONLY pointing out the dangers inherent in these partnerships.

 

TO: November 19, 2007 9:01 AM

In this case not, but there are alot of men who cheat on their wives, A husband might tell his wife that she's the only one for him, he's truly committed to her and only her but when things get shaky in a marriage his eyes starts looking at other women.

 

The correct word for the article caption is "tarfus" and not "treifos".

 

November 19, 2007 9:01 AM

Not in this case but there are many husbands that cheat on their wives in one way or another and the marriage ends in divorce

 

Basically ,this should be nobody's business. I don't understand why Chaptzem put it on this blog. Is nothing private anymore?

 

WHAT I DONT UNDERSTAND WHY WOULD A JEW GO PARTNERSHIP W/ AN ARAB FOR CRYING OUT LOUD ARE THEY KNOWN TO BE YOUR BEST FRIEND? LISTEN GIRL YOUR LOOKING FOR GREAT TROUBLE

 

You know all you people are totally nuts here who crticize her for trying to make a buck while her husband is learning in Kollel are hypocrites. How do you expect her to support a family if you want her husband to be politically correct by learning in Kollel?

 

At the very least, they won't have Kashrus scandals that plague the BeHeimishe establishments. Another upside is, the joint might be clean enough to eat at.

 

Anon 11;47 AM: HEllo! This was in the New York Times! Chaptzem only Posted it from there. Wake up! NOTHING is private with the Internet.
Anon Nov 19 1;39 pm;I despise women like you who are jealous of Men in the Buisness world , and think they can do better.This is not to say that women cant be better Buisness people than men. This has to do with Frum women going out and dealing with Goyishe Men on a regular basis. It is against Halacha to do this pecause it invairably leads to improper conduct.You are probably one of those housewives who are miserable taking care of children.As you can see by the posts most agree that this woman is acting improperly.The Job of a Jewish woman is to raise G-d fearing jewish children

 

FOR THOSE WHO OBJECT to this woman doing business with a man , I pose this question:

Why then is it ok for kollel wives to work in close quarters with men in offices, where there is vulgarity and potential sexual harassment , to support husbands who are learning Torah?

I'm not pro or con on this issue , but I'd like to know why one situation is kosher and the other isn't?

 

there are plenty of women who run businesses and there's nothing wrong with that. One must just be careful who she takes in as a partner.

 

8:52

The kollel wife who works in an office looks for an office job where there are more than just her and another man. For her to work alone with a man would have Yichud problems. But if there are several people there, each is doing his/her job.

If there is sexual harassment, she can report it, or quit and go elsewhere.

To have one partner, a man who is not your husband, is very different. She has a lot of money invested, and can't just walk out and quit.
She is not just doing her job, but planning, and sharing in the emotional roller coaster of growing a business, which can be a lot of fun, but also much stress and many decisions. There is a sharing of excitement, disappointment, and other emotions that she will be sharing with this one man.

I am not saying it is ossur, if she is VERY careful to not be alone with him. But that is VERY difficult to do.

And no matter how careful one is, sharing those emotions with a person of the opposite gender other than your wife/husband is dangerous as it can lead to emotion involvement that was not planned, wanted or expected.

I would feel the same way about a man going into a partnership with a woman.

I am a man, and I HAVE already turned down a few possibilities of partnerships with women whom I was not married to.

I have been in business before, more than a few times, and remember the emotions. I would not wish to share those emotions with a woman who was not my wife.

This is just my opinion.

I also feel funny about a man who would send his wife out to do this while he just sits and learns. Now, if he were a partner too, and he dropped in a couple of times a day, and shared in all the emotions and decisions of growing this business
I MAY feel differently.

But YICHUD is halacha, not a chumra. A married woman is NOT permitted to be alone with another man. PERIOD.

The same goes for a married man. He is not permitted to be alone with another woman. PERIOD.

Now, in an office where there are other people constantly coming in and out, there MAY BE a leniency, and in a store or restaurant also. But to own the business together, one is alone at times doing the books, or inventory, or most importantly, discussing the plans of the business.

This is very hard to keep to only circumstances where you are not alone.

I know I treasure my marriage with my wife, and would NOT risk it by taking on a female partner.

Just the thought of going over the month's or quarter's books, and seeing a great, hard-earned profit and saying, "YES!" ... is not something I would want to do with a woman other than my wife.
Is my wife were my partner, I would be saying, "YES!" and hugging her, or giving her a "High 5" etc.,

I remember some other exiting business moments in the past where my wife and I celebrated very emotionally.

Now there are people who never get emotional. They may have it easier. I am not one of those.

Now, remember, I am not trying to say I am a rov and/or giving a psak. I am only sharing my concern for another Jew, hoping to save another Jew from tripping over a potential obstacle.

 

A) The doughnuts come from a kosher bakery in Borough Park?!?!?

B) And there is one edict they both obey. “Neither of us is allowed to enjoy the profits of the pork,” Ms. Gluck said. Any money the business makes on the sale of bacon, sausage or ham — foods that are forbidden in both their religions — is split and given away, hers to her synagogue and to Israel, his to the workers as bonuses.

Hello, didn’t anybody see these two lines? Kosher and non-kosher in one store? Aren’t Dunkin Donuts supposed to be from Dunkin and not the DonutMan? Who gives the Hashgacha on the store, they are (technically) selling trief!!!

Why would her synagogue want pork money? And who in Israel is getting the pork money? Dare I say the PLO?

Wake up people there are more problems here than who may end up sleeping with whom. This enterprise should be shut down immediately.

This whole business does not sound according to Halachah.

 

to anon 11/20 @ 5:04am

Your arguments and reasoning are very eloquent and logical. But like all arguments, you have to look at the root causes of why things like this are happening. In the frum, heimishe world, it seems that the lesser of the two evils of tzinus and geneiva, geneiva would be more preferable. And to be poilitically correct, there is a lot of pressure for the husband to sit and learn and make the wife the breadwinner and to raise the children. Now, I ask you using the same eloquence and logic, how is she supposed to support a possibly large family and her husband as well by just sitting at home? Do you want her to be forced to resort to geneiva and borrowing left and right like a lot of people in BP and Williamsburg and elsewhere? I don't think so....

 

I urge klal yisroel not to patronize the Dunkin Donust open now on Church Avenue and East 17 Street near Flatbush in Brooklyn. An Arab has allegedly bought this franchise as an equal partner with Hindy (Cindy) Gluck, a heimishe and chassidishe woman from Boro Park. Treifos are sold in their store, even though the donuts allegedly come from a kosher bakery in Boro Park. This is a chillul HaShem for a yid to go into a business partnership with a Muslim, and there is also an issur of hilchos yichud al yad here. There is no hechsher on the store and I highly doubt cholov yisroel milk or dairy is available on the premesis. Our money should not be going to benei pelei odom- the sons of Yishmoel, the wild man, and may we have siyata d'shamaya. May this atrocity be removed from our midst, behaymru veyomeinu.

 

The post and many of the comments are truly disgusting.

This has a huge "raiach" (using the term of one of the commenters) of lashon harah in this article.

I'd suggest that we all look at our own deeds and improve ourselves instead of criticising others based on a newspaper article.

(The above was a polite way of saying MYOFB, you closed-minded, judgemental, misogynistic, bigoted, hypocritical, chitzoniyus, pretend-frum jerks.)

 

ENOUGH ALREAD...!!

She's running , by all accounts , an honest business. So what's the problem? Some of you guys are obsessed with "Tznius" but don't give a rat's wind about the other issues. Some guy is worried about cholov yisroel being sold there. Who needs sour nauseating New Square? Another is worried about emotional closeness to another man.
Well for crying out loud..!!! Where are you when thousands of kollel bochorim send their wives out into the secular world to work with men? How come this isn't talked about? How come the rabbonin sanction this??

Bottom line... You have a problem with her?? Don't shop there. End of story.

 

Looks good to me. She looks so happy. Where can I find a Muslim who wants to open a Dunkin Donuts?

 

wow!

The goy looks pretty happy to have her there on the side; seductively bending over like that, touching his his hand ever so lightly, brushing him with her Clary sheitel...
Nice addition to his 2 wives and 17 children!

 

It is forbodden to SELL foods forbidden to eat

See Yore Deah 117

 

Grow up, men and women work together all the time without having affairs. It is absurd to think that inevitably intimacy will grow between a man and a woman. You can respect someone and have a platonic friendship without being attracted to them. Sorry guys you can't have it both ways if you want your wife to be the naive maidel you married, then man up and get a job. Don't sit in Kollel (unless you're one of the twelve guys who actually are meant for Kollel)and expect her to raise your kids, cook your dinner and earn a living. Aidel maidel's come with brains and they really smarten up when they have to support a family. Oh and the most perverted, crudest boss I ever had was a married man from Boro Park. Wasn't attracted to him at all.....didn't respect him either.

 

isn't there i "isur" in selling "triafus"?
if it happens by mistake it is permitted, but purposely i thing there is halachic problems

 

Well its my first time posting a comment here too. But I felt I needed to because I know Hindy from when she was just a little girl. And the first thing I wanna make clear is that they were never sooo poor they couldnt afford food!!!!!! That is something I would like to say for her parents respect....I know them both and happen to be very nice people. Now for Hindy shell always be Hindy. Shes a very nice kid and I like her , she doesnt always make the best choices in life but maybe one day she will notice it!!!!!

 

What im realizing as im reading the comments is that some or most jews are racist. y cant we all get along, so what that hes a muslim, thats exactly what i hate about religion, anomosity, hatred, division.

 

8:10

Who cares what race or religion he is. Most of us are only concerned that he is on the male gender, and not the particular male she is married to.

3:15

Working together is not the same as growing a business together. One is working near another person, sometimes talking, sometimes working together. But, if a man is a partner with a woman, growing a business with her, they will be worrying together, planning together, feeling JOY at good decisions together, and other emotional situations.

Oh, sure,I am sure there are many frum perv bosses out there. I wish it were not so, but it is the truth. But if you are an employee, you can walk out and look for another job. You may be without pay for a week or two, but you will find something else. But... if you have your life savings invested in a business, you can't just walk out. .. besides, working together is not the same as being a partner.

To me, the emotional roller coaster of running a business is more intense than the working relationship a person of either gender should have with a member of the opposite sex who is not your spouse.

I am a man, and I believe it would be VERY wrong for me to be partners with a woman. Those feelings shared by partners are feelings I should only share with my wife.

 

What a chilul hashem!

Spending time alone with this man and who knows how many other - you think she even realizes that she's touching him?

By now she's naaseh lo k'heter.

what's next, a NYT article about a chasidishe lady having muslim babies?

 

To the one who wants to know the difference between getting a 9-5 job and owning business'es "so call it" I know her and Ill tell you. A working mom is home after 5 a business womans job never ends, if a meeting is called for 8pm shes there if a meeting is called in Florida or anywhere else in the freaking world shes there......her husband cooks takes care of the kids and everyhting most mothers do. And who says he HAS TO LEARN? is he forced to by her.....I know the answer and it is NO....so there u go thats one difference. she doesnt give a damn for a "learning husband".

 

Hindy, you're a disgust to society for your behavior.

I hope your husband divorces you for your behavior bekorav mamash.

What a chillul hashem you showed to the world. Shame on you.

 

Shame on those of you who condemn Hindy. She is earning kesef and is showing to the world that even Yidden and Arabs can make peace. This is a Kiddush HaShem.

 

Although Yidden and Arabs can make peace it's not right for Hindy to go into partnership with a male especially she's married.

It's mamash a chillul Hashem.

 

Hindy's shaitel looks ugly, too much makeup.

She's a total mess rachmana litzlan.

I think she went off the derech.

 

so this 'frum' slim, petite squeezes into a tight office with a muslim, very nice.

I wonder how she gets her real-estate deals done what a smile.

 

she probably wants him to so she can move in with the muslim and study the koran together while she wears the dress he bought her

 

hindy's a shiksa through and through.

I hope her children are raised by the father in a yiddishe environment.

Hindy is an embarassment to her family and entire k'lall yisroel.

Shame on you Hindy.

 

what a sweet, happy couple

 

I heard one of the guys in my shul in Flatbush talking about this lady. He said he does work with her all the time and hangs out with her alot. He said if her chasidiche husband reads this and leaves her he wants to marry her.

 

rachmuna litzlun

 

November 24, 2007 6:51 PM

How you could say they're
a sweet, happy couple? Are you crazy or something?

 

I hope that Hindy's husband gives her a get immediately because of her behavior. What will be with the children? Who will have custody of them?

 

Hindy, people like you should not be worthy to walk the face of the earth.

 

It's a shame that Hindy couldn't be in partnership with someone else, other than a goy.

 

She's at the point in her life that she really doesnt care about you or your insults. She'll do whatever she wants with whoever you want and she's so rich now that no one can tell her what to do. If the rabunim dont like it they can jump in a lake, she gives tzedakah and can get away with anything she wants, guys, treif etc.
Now bug off and worry about yourselves.

 

I HATE YOU HINDY. I knew you for so many years but I never believed you'd actually do something like this. What got to you?

 

listen, you're clearly jealous - probably driving around your old car while she drives her new Lexus, you live in an old rented apartment but she has a new mansion in Boro Park, you live from paycheck to paycheck and she puts away millions each month and you're married to the same fat guy and she hangs out with rich good looking guys who spoil her.

Get a life and stop the jealosy. last I checked it is worse than sleeping with someone elses husband or selling treif.

 

Hindy deserves to go to gehonim right now.

 

Hindy, Get your life together. Think about all the damage you're doing to your husband and kids.

 

My heart goes out to the children. Hindy, you're causing a lot of damage to them. Think about their future when it comes to talking about shidduchim.

 

Hindy, you're not fit to be a parent. Nebach these are innocent children and do not deserve to have such a horrible mother.

 

Hindy, did anyone tell you that you're ugly?

 

You can tell Hindy doesn't care about Judaism. If she did there wouldn't be ANY KIND of physical contact (like arms are brushing against each other).

This pic is a disgrace to be posted.

 

November 18, 2007 1:39 PM
"while the men work and have affairs with thier secretary"

Is this something that your husband does which you don't know about? Think about it. Check his different moodswings, behavior in general.

 

I heard she loves this publicity and loves people to talk and write about her. She told everyone she knows about this article.

 

I hope her kids dont go off the derech

 

What are these gifts that you're getting?

 

well, for one her Muslim buddy brings her Muslim gifts. what her US beau's bring her you'll never know

 

The real question ought to be, how did a sweet heimishe girl end up so desperate for attention.

I wasnt in her class but was in her sisters grade and she seemed happy enough from what I remember.

Clearly she doesnt need the money from this treif store as someone already said she makes burech hashem lots of money and has a nice house and drives a fency car.

What Hindy seems to be missing so desperetly is attention. So much so that not only does she open a well known name store (high profile) but also does it with an Arab (high profile), get's the NYT to write an article about her (high profile) touches her partner in the picture she chooses (high profile) and then sends it around to everyone to show off(high profile).

If this isnt a rachmunus, what is? I think we should go out of our way to give Hindy attention as she seems to be so terribly missing some.

I'm also married to an 'arranged husband' we all were and while most of us are not romantically in love, we're not screaming to the world - look at me!

Call her up, make her happy as this is nebach a very sad story.

Please, I ask all of you to please be friends with her,it's pikiach neifesh.

Hopefully your friendship and acceptence will put her back on the emesa deirech and she will stop screaming for attention and doing things that are wrong.

 

She needs to be put in a mental institution and the people will give her all the sympathy in the world. They'll drug her big time, making sure she walks around like a zombie.

Sorry, My heart DOES NOT go out to her. My heart GOES OUT TO THE CHILDREN.

I hope that the children are functioning normal. With having such a crazy mother, this will put emotional damage on them. Their lives are messed up now.

Let the children be raised in a healthy heimishe loving home.

 

God, you people are part of the reason why I left Orthodox Judaism! I can't say I'm surprised, though, as I ran into your type all of the time, even in more "modern" neighborhoods like Kew Gardens Hills! The vast majority of posters on here are shameful, judgmental and disgusting. You condemn this woman with insinuations that she is already having an affair with this man, fer crying out loud! (Which is 100% Loshon Hora, by the way, if you truly follow your religion, which I can tell that most of you DON'T!) At the same time, you're not even thinking about what a lot of Orthodox and Chassidic MEN do. Let's just say some of these Mikvahs get pretty gropy at times; I know, I've been in many of them, and the gropiest one is in---surprise!---Boro Park.

 

Clealry you (ex-Mikvah goer) have issues that turned you away from yiddishkeit, perhaps justifiably so, but that does not make her actions and behavior less appropriate (unless of course something effected her as well).

Perhaps you can both benefit from professional psychiatric help that if received from the correct person will surely help.

There are many sites that you can research the specialty and experience levels of psychiatrists and psychologists who can work you thru all issues and can help with and without medication.

Unfortunately there is often a big stigma associated with going, this should not be a reason not to go - many are very private even having private enterences.

You both need help, start by recognizing this, that will be the biggest help you can do for yourself.

 

Folks... I wrote some very very long posts up there. I said I was "concerned" about this issue. But I never attacked Hindy. I only showed concern about where this may lead, etc. (the intimacy of growing a business together with a man who is not her husband.)

This thread had turned into a Bash Hindy thread. She is a Heimishe woman whom we are m'chuyav to love. Not to call names, not to wish terrible things on.

We should be encouraging her to get out of that dangerous situation, but pushing her away by being downright mean!

And, yes, some of what I have read above IS DOWNRIGHT MEAN and certainly not within the guidlines of ahavas yisroel.

Hindy, I hope you make your marriage work, and spend a lifetime with your husband in happiness.

Hindy, I hope you sell your share of this dangerous biz, but ignore the hatefull remarks by our fellow Heimishe people.

Hindy, Just because you may have "dipped your toes" into the ocean, does not mean you need to dive in.

Many, Chassidish, and Yeshivish people "tasted" the "outside world," but returned and were/are good husbands, wives, mothers, father, rabbonim, roshei yeshivos, etc.,

That a person "tastes" the "outside world" does not make her a bad person.

Notice she is still wearing her sheitel. She still talks about being a frum woman.

So, maybe she stepped over the line a bit. Many have, and have stepped back.

But if everyone is mean and nasty and hateful to these people, they are 'pushed' way farther than they originally intended to go.



From the words that many of you all wrote, I can see how many heimishe people want to go off the derech and tell you all to go to H*** I have never read such hateful, spiteful garbage.

Considering the situation, she may have been truly UNAWARE of her partner's arm sitting on top of hers. It may have been an accidental one-time thing.

She may have done NOTHING WRONG AT ALL other than make a questionable decision about whom to take as a partner.

But... from the looks of some of the posts above, I bet her partner treat her better than her fellow Jew.

To Hindy's Husband: Please have patience with her. As long as she has not gone over the halachik line that leaves you with no b'raira, make her feel loved and secure with you. Give her a chance, and PLEASE make sure you stand by her and protect her from A**holes like those above who are being nasty to her....

I do not believe that Hindy wants poshut attention. I bet she is a wonderful Heimishe woman who wants some "RECOGNITION" for who she is, and what she can accomplish, and appreciation for the fact that she can do more than cook, clean and change diapers. (No, I am not making fun of that.).

I bet Hindy is a wonderful fun-loving person, and wonderful person to be married to, if you recognize and appreciate her for who she is.

Hindy: Pull back now, before you go over the line. I am not talking about with your partner. I am talking about telling the heimishe world to **** Off for the way they are treating you. Once you tell them all off, and throw off the Livush, and go off the derech, it will hurt those you do love.

The big mouths above, let them all go to ****. Come back, we love you and welcome you.

And, yes, I am a man, a Chassidishe man, and the Love I speak of is Ahavas Yisroel, only, and not something inappropriate, but I do recognize that this lady, Hindy has some wonderful, special capabilities. She should be maybe running a moisad of ours.

Her special talents should NOT go to waste. And her neshama, which I know is very special, should be treated with the love, respect, recognition, it truly deserves.

 

November 26, 2007 9:19 PM

"And, yes, I am a man, a Chassidishe man"

You claim to be a Chassidishe man, but what is a chasidishe man like you able to use vulgarity words like: let them all go to ****, I am talking about telling the heimishe world to **** Off, protect her from A**holes like those above who are being, .
tell you all to go to H*** and other rearks you stated.

A Chassidishe man like you shouldn't know such words, think of such words, and even write them even though the word is not spelled out in its entirety.

Shame on you chassidishe man.

 

I live in Flatbush and have a first cousin that went off the derech Rachmana Litzlon for about 8years. He tried returning to Yiddishkeit but unfortunately it was to no avail. We've been taking him to various Chabad programs for close to 1 1/2 years but he still has no desire to be the Yid he was before he went off the Derech.

His whole interest is now behaving like a goy, eat things that Are treif, hang out with the wrong people, dress like a goy, NEVER davens, etc. etc. etc.

It's extremely difficult for someone to remain a Yid after one goes astray.

 

so he's not a chasidishe...who cares?

If it's a friend of Hindy's sticking up for her that's very nice also.

Bottom line, we need to stop this hatred in Klal Yisruel and need to be more free with our kids to express and share their sexuality so they dont feel the need to snap.

sheltering kids in todays day of readily available porn is no way to go.

look what happened here and all around you. Let your sons have girlfriends and your daughters have boyfriends but explain to them what limits are and how they should not cross them.

Rachmunah Litzlun if we just pretend we're still living in the alter heim.

 

12:41

I was only trying "graphically" with words to demonstrate the anger that WE can cause in a person by putting him or her down for anything he or she may do differently from the rest.

This anger is real, and does drive chareidi people away from the derech.

Often the Yetzer Hora leads a person to dip his or her toe into places he or she should not.

When we see a fellow Heimishe person do this, we need to reach out with LOVE and encourage them to keep it straight, and re-channel their energies in "kosher" directions.

Instead, often people attack, embarrass, call names, and generally make the person who only dipped his or her toe into the lake... feel too embarrassed to return. They get hurt and angry.

They feel, "I know what I am doing. I know I will not go too far, why can't they trust me. If someone though I was going too far, or was going to go off the derech, why didn't he/she approach me quietly and privately to talk to me. Instead, he/she has humiliated me so much I could never show my face in public again in the heimishe oilam."

This leads to strong anger, which I tried to show with the Words with the **** .... and causes good people to be pushed away, off the derech.

My thesis is that I believe most of the people who go off the derech, did not intend to originally. They may have made a mistake, and let their Yeytzer Hora lead them to dip their toe into something "not quite right" but still not horrible.

But, if we do not approach them with love, ... if we attack them instead... now they are pushed away.

The Beesha that we can cause a person by attacking him or her, can, and often is, the final straw in pushing people off the derech.

A big, highly respected Rov once told me that the only difference between the person who is caught dipping their toe into wrong areas and those who correct them with angry words,pushing them away, is that one was caught and the other was not. He said, many honest, good, frum people are lead by their Yeytzer Hora to "taste" what they should not. They then "wake up" either by themselves or with the help of a true friend, and correct the behavior. The problem is that some are "Caught" by insensitive jerks, who attack instead of reaching out with love, and now drive that person away.

Just like you attacked me for those "words" **** ... Even the most Chassidish man who is out there in the real world, hears and learns words. He understands them. He is not a deaf moron.

But, the knowledge of these words should mean that I should be "Ashamed of Myself"??

Better yet, people who are too busy attacking other people should be ashamed of themselves.

Yes, I wrote a very long post above mentioning my "Concern" about the dangers of Hindy growing a business with a partner she is not married to.

But others ATTACKED HER VICIOUSLY.

That is what I was going on about. To those of you who were offended by my comments like: go to ****, I apologize.

I meant only to show how angry we make a person who did not really intend to go off the derech but is just making a little mistake.

He/she needs to be spoken to with respect, and the love that we all feel for each and every Yid.

Remember, if every person who strayed momentarily were pushed away, our shuls would be nearly empty.

Who among us can say we never strayed a little, even if just for the moment???
I am not one. Are you? Let me hear you say that you are.

 

Returning to Hashem after going astray is NOT an easy task. That's why people who goes off the derech do things like Hindy and probably remain that way for a very long time.

I hope and pray that Hindy has not gone astray and if she did Chas Veshalom, may Hashem give her the Koach, Chochmah, and Binah to realize that this is not the derech a Yiddishe Tachter should behave. This behavior is NOT ACCEPTABLE to the eyes of Hashem and fellow Yidden.

I hope her Mishpacha, especially her beloved husband and precious children will still love her, cherish her in spite of all what is going on.

 

Hindy, think of what November 26, 2007 9:19 PM wrote. There's so much Varmkeit in that blog.

 

Anonymous said...
Folks... I wrote
November 26, 2007 9:19 PM

You need to keep your comment concise, brief and not go on forever.

 

November 26, 2007 9:19 PM

I am a Chassidishe man who lives in BP. I am in total shock of some of the filthy language you used in your blog. I had shown your blog to all of my Chasidishe friends who also live in BP and they just couldn't believe their eyes.

I could just imagine what else you do or say that is NOT KEDERECH a Yid whether he/she be a Frimmer from Birth without being Chassidish, Chassidish, Orthodox, etc.

SUCH LANGUAGE SHOULD NEVER BE USED!!!

Who knows maybe you also have Chassidisher friends who also speak the same way as you do. You need to change your choice of words.

 

Are there any English newspapers that's talking about Hindy's story?

Unfortunately not everyone in the world has a computer and that's why they can't make any comment but I'm sure they'd love to read about it in a paper. Won't you think so?

 

This issue is about a precious heimishe woman edging off the derech. A Chassidishe man was brave enough to be very outspoken with love, caring and true Ahavas Yisroel.

And you attack his language or choice of words? He was being dramatic, but I thought very effective.

What are the priorities here, to find fault with everyone, or try to save this woman?

 

No, this story need not more publicity that it is unfortunately already getting. The more publicity the more people are going to attack Hindy. The more attacks, the further we are shoving her away.

Thank you to
November 26, 2007 9:19 PM
Who is showing us the right way.

 

November 27, 2007 4:45 PM

So, you never spoke too strongly when angry? Maybe you are on that madraiga. But the man who used that language is the only one here who was warm, understanding, and caring about this Heimishe woman. He spoke well, even if his words were strong. And he did use those ***.

 

November 26, 2007 9:19 PM

Thank you for the Divrei Tochacha that we as Yidden must show constantly toward our fellow Yidden especially when something wrong is happening to them, like the possibility of Hindy going off the Derech.

You have an eloquent approach in voicing you opinion.

Once again Yosher Koach for the entire blog.

Smile

 

When one is angry, one must learn to control their speech. One must not use vulgarity under any circumstances.

 

YICHUD is now muttor because it's business?
She is still 'frum'?
Does she bring that food home?
What does her (ex?) husband say to this?
What about her Rov (if she has one)?
Are the children getting a wrong message?

 

One who saves one person is like saving the entire world (Pirkei Avos)

In this case we must do all we can to make sure that Hindy does not go off the derech. We must NOT focus on the Chassidishe man that used inappropriate language. The latter is NOT the key issue of this blog.

November 26, 2007 9:19 PM

You couldn't have conveyed your message in a better way. They were very strong powerful words which left a very strong emotional impact on me.

Yosher Koach for your Divrei Chizuk and Hisorirus.

Keep up the good work.

 

November 26, 2007 9:19 PM

Your words were very inspirational.

Yasher Koach.

 

10:19

You are right. I apologized 3 times already for offending with my "implied vulgarity."

Remember, I did not use any nasty words, but I did imply them by typing those asterisks.

It is interesting to note though, that I did not replace only one letter with the asterisks, but only typed one real letter, and the rest were asterisks.

And, all you critics read right through it. This kind of shows that these words are just as easy to you as they are to others. So knew what I was typing.

If a Chassidishe person should not know those words, how come you knew what I was typing, when all but one letter was a star?

I apologize anyway, for no matter how angry one gets, he should watch his tongue, of typing finger... and though I used stars, I should not have even written those.

 

November 26, 2007 9:19 PM

My husband and I are both Chasidisge people and we're fully aware of the vulgarity, nasty words.

No matter how angry we shouldn't be towards one another, or about another human being we NEVER EVER use vulgar language.

There's always a way that you can accomplish doing something WITHOUT the vulgar language.

I could just imagine what your Rov, Rebbe, parents, siblings would think of you if any one of those people would hear you speak in such a language.

Just because you typed out part of the vulgar words, it's as if you're actually saying them.

I am aware of the fact that you already apologized, but an apology is useless if you REALLY DON'T MEAN IT. Not here or anywhere else, whether it be by posting a comment or speaking to someone on a phone or person to person face to face, YOU SHOULD NEVER EVER USE VULGARITY AT ANY TIME!!!!

 

yes, I agree with 11/26/07 @ 9:19pm

You are a true mentch and gentleman who sounds like he really cares about this woman and speaks from the heart. If only I had met people like you while growing up in BP, maybe my frumkeit and chizuk would be much stronger. You are truly one of a kind!

 

It's nice when there are people out there that are concerned about Hindy's wellbeing.

I know Hindy for at least 8 years. I have seen her when she was acting like a Jew is supposesd to act and much more times when she acted like a shiksa.

I approached her many times when she wasn't acting in a Jewish way.
I spoke to her with love, warmth, as one sister speaks to another sister. We were very best friends (and we still are).

When Hindy didn't like the kind warm words I said to her, all she said was "My your Own Business and I will do as I please". From that time on I learned not to speak to her about something that she's doing which is not appropriate.

I just daven to Hashem that Hindy will realize on her own that she must change her Derachim and live KeHalacha.

Hindy, no matter what I'm still concerned about you and hope that only the best of happiness is in your life forever.

 

I wonder how many times in her life was she in a partnership with a Goy? Is the the first time or the 5th time?

 

Would you say that the gifts that the Goy buys her is a way that the Goy wants her for himself?

Does she wear his stuff to work? Does she brag to everyone that my partner bought me this outfit, ring, etc?

What does her husband say from all the gifts she receives from him?

 

Muslims and Jews have a lot of common things and maybe that's why she had no problem being in a business with him. Who knows?

 

November 26, 2007 9:19 PM

I wonder if the Chofetz Chaim would approve your vulgarity.

 

8:44

Not important whether the Chofetz Chaim approves or disapproves. I myself disapprove of my own vulgarity in that above post. I admitted I was wrong, and apologized 3 times above.

How many more times do I get beat up for my mistake?

Well, to be honest, if it stops people from beating up on Hindy, beat me up for my vulgarity some more. Just leave her alone, unless you want to show her understanding and caring.

Yes, I need to seal my mouth better. I worked for a few years in an industry where they spoke like that so much, that I guess I was affected. I should have left earlier. But, my mouth is my responsibility not that of those I used to work with.

I was trying to express how angry someone gets when fellow yidden beat them up verbally for a mistake. How that anger can push them away, instead of helping them.

True, I went "over the line" and used bad loshon. I already apologized for that.

But, though some of you read and appreciated the content of my post, others just beat me up for my language, as if that were the entire post, or complained that I was too long winded.

To those who bashed me for being too long winded, remember, you can just scroll down and ignore me.

To those whom I offended with my language, I apologize now for the 4th time.

To those who saw something of value in my posts, thank you.


Now, I would like to write a bit more: What is the purpose of this blog? Is it to find fellow Yidden and embarrass and hurt them? or is it to find things or areas where we may be helpful?

If it is to try to be helpful, then let's try to do so without hurting and embarrassing people and their families.

I do not live in NY, so I can not do anything but type here. But those of you who know Hindy, reach out to her again, and again, and again .... with love ... don't give up on her.

Reach out ... don't push her further away with meanness.

 

Hindy, I'm a close friend of yours and I just wanted to wish you a lot of hatzlacha with your new business.

 

Hindy, are you able to constrain yourself from not eating these Treif donuts?

 

Hindy, know that there are a lot of people on your side no matter what derech you choose to go. We will NOT push you away from us because you're straying.

 

After reading all your previous posts I really recall the popular "maase" of the Rebbe and the apikores who owned a soap factory. The apikores told the rebbe he no longer believed in G-d because "pious" people were a bunch of hyprocrites. So, the Rebbe told his chossid that he also didn't believe in the soap because kids become again dirties after taking a shower.

You get the point. Even if you don't accept Hindy's decision, it's up only to her and not to you, if she wants to have a shtele with a goy is her business, not yours. Stop wishing her curses and get a live instead of seeig other people's garden.

You wish her kids don't left the derech, however, with your messages you creates more chillul hashem tha can take away more yiddishe kinderlech from derech, r"l.

All my support Hindy and paransa tova!!!

 

You know, all these people who are critical of Hindy should look at themselves using the this blog on the net. I'm sure many of you have tried looking at shmizige things on the net becuz you have the privacy and access to the net. Keshoit atzmach, ve'achar keshoit acheirim.

 

there's nothing wrong giving opinions. on the contrary one is mechuav to give someone tochacah if one is doing wrong however one should not curse because of what she wants to do with her life. she is the only one that will suffer the cosequences if business doesn't go well.

if one doesn't want to voice their opinion, let them not write.

 

are you going to be eating any kosher jelly donuts on chanukah?

 

do you sell potato latkes so you can have jelly donuts and latkes on chanukah?

 

which tastes better a treif jelly donut or a kosher jelly donut?

 

can you please give me the recipe for making jelly donuts?

 

there are people that eat milchig on chanukah, do you?

 

It is so obvious to me that some of the peopel posting negative things about Hindy are "ladies" who are insanely jealous of her. She's thin, cute, fashionable with the money for a nice house, car and sheitel...Green with envy, aren't you?

 

money is here today but gone tommorrow. You do not take your money with you after 120 years.

What's Hindy going to take with her? The fact that she has a business with a GOY one must not need to be jealous of.

The way how Hashem can make a person rich, Hashem can make the same person poor in so many ways. Hashem can also make a poor person rich.

Hindy strives for attention and that's very sad. Better to have no attention than to have a reputaion that people don't want to associate themselves with you.

There's NOTHING about her that one should be jealous. She's NOT CUTE, just wondering who did her sheitel- who knows if the sheitel is real which then means it's an Avodah Zara.

 

Come on, I'm a goy and even *I* can tell it's a wig!! It is a very nice one, though. Almost makes me want to convert so I had a reason to buy one!

 

December 11, 2007 7:38 AM

*I* can tell it's a wig!! It is a very nice one, though.

This is YOUR opinion only but guaranteed the majority of us Jews do NOT agree with you. Just wonder who did the sheitel. It looks horrible on her.

 

why all the talk about her wig? is that what this story is about? i think that you missed the point.

 

What is the issur in partnering with a goy?

 

What is the issur in partnering with a goy?

December 23, 2007 12:56 AM

One thing leads to another. Who knows they could get emotionally involved with one another, get married, have kids, etc. r"l

 

Hilchos Yichud negia and kreiva apply to eveyone in the workplace. Sfardimhave had business partnerships with Muslims for cnturies. I don't understand the big deal.

 

Sfardimhave had business partnerships with Muslims for cnturies.
December 23, 2007 2:38 PM

---------------

It doesn't mean that's the right thing to do.

 

The comments here are truly demented-not just the hateful ones but the "we should reach out to her and help her" type.
What she is doing is perfectly normal and legal-and in no way against jewish law.
Jewish women may run business
Jews may partner with Gentiles
and-jews may sell treif to gentiles
My own grandmother was a daughter of a rebbe-and had a similair business-in relation to the time.
Brought her whole family over to the new world!

 

how's business coming along? are there any jewish customers?

 

why can't she work in Dunkin’ Donuts?

 

12:44 PM

PURE TREIF PLACE especially selling all the chazeriy like bacon

 

This is a shanda and a busha. To touch and laugh and be so close is never mutar.

There seem to be many issues at play in this situation:

1) The fact that she is not only working with a male but she is actually his business partner this involves an emotional relationship in many ways. 2) He is a goy 3) The many halachic questions that are involved with keeping the store open on shabbos and selling treifus. This whole story creates a sticky situation that is unpleasant in many ways.

There are things in this story that I definatly have a problem with. 1. The changing the name - I know a lot of people do it, but it does say that one of the things Bnei Yisrael were praised for in Mitzrayim was NOT changing their names. hmm. 2. Why sell pork at all? Giving tzedakah from the profits of pork is still considered "benefitting from non-kosher in any way" - this is NOT okay

 

is it ok to give tzeduka from trifa food does her shul know where the money is coming from?

 

I am close to the Glucks for many years. The husband is a real talmid chacham and yerei shamaim and the whole family is a beautiful family. It is easy to tell the great effort both Hindy and her husband put into the chinuch of their children in addition to many other maasim tovim. There are few such special people. All these kanaim who feel they must criticize them would think differently if they knew them. I never heard a bad word about anybody from the Glucks, and they deserve at least to be treated the same. What makes these negative people always feel like criticizing others? Did the Glucks ever push their views on anybody? The "fress truck" in Williamsburg can at least be seen in some psychotic way as a danger to others; but why is this anybody's business other than the Glucks and Mr. Habib's? Even if these commenters are poskim (which I highly doubt) and feel that it goes against halacha, can't they understand that there are other view points? I know for a fact that they have the support of chashuve rabbanim in what they do. I wish them a lot of hatzlacha. And
to all you negative people: there's enough evil in this world for you to critisize without looking for private issues of erliche yidden that aren't according to your taste.

 

January 01, 2008 10:20 PM
I KNOW HINDY VERY WELL FOR MANY YEARS AND SHE'S NOT ALL THAT.

 

I know Cindy quite well. She is a hard working successful woman, who cares about her family & friends. She had an opportunity to invest her hard earned money and did so. Nothing more , nothing less. The amazing thing is how people can go judge this person without actually knowing her! and I know that the people bad mouthing her dont know her because if they did, they would know how amazing she really is! This I can tell you first hand. Cindy I wish you well in all your endeavors. Just continue to be yourself and ignore all the negative people.

S.I.G.H.