Thursday, March 22, 2018
Rockland Jewish Women: What does modesty mean?
The store is filled with beautiful clothing, full of vibrant colors and rich fabrics.
But you won't find pants, miniskirts or tank tops in Blew Boutique in Monsey, which caters to Rockland's Orthodox Jewish population.
"Even though we're modest, it doesn't mean we have to be ugly and not put together," said shop owner Shaindy Klein. "It's a sense of pride. It's an inner confidence. It's how we represent ourselves."
Modesty is an important part of being an Orthodox Jewish woman.
"Tznius," or "Tzniut" for Sephardic and Israeli Jews, is the word used to describe the traditional modest manner of dress and appearance. That means outfits which cover the knees, elbows, collarbone and midriff. Married women also cover their hair.
Like many aspects of Orthodox Judaism, there is a spectrum of observance within modesty, and women dress how they are most comfortable, sometimes in pants or short sleeves and other times in neutral colors and loose clothing.
Head covering for married women varies among Orthodox Jews.
"This is the way the wigs come, every length, every color," said Ayelet Berman, who owns the L'Image salon in Monsey. "Everybody has a preference for what they want. It also depends on where they come from. Depends on tradition, of which part of the world they come from."
Some women don't cover their hair and others won't wear a wig ("sheitel") at all, only a scarf ("tichel" or "snood") because wigs look too much like hair.
The concept of modesty is not to "take the Jewish women and make sure that they don't look good and shouldn't be attractive," said a Hasidic woman living in Ramapo. "It's not true. It's not about that."
The woman did not want her name used, saying it doesn't fit in with her practice of modesty.
She said a strict interpretation of "halacha," or Jewish law, is behind the stringent dress habits of Hasidic women. They usually wear short wigs with a hat, scarf or band, so that it does not look too much like natural hair.
Tznius does not only refer to one's appearance.
"It's the way you see yourself and present yourself," said Rorie Weisberg.
An Orthodox Jew, Weisberg is a Kosher health coach who teaches women to appreciate, love and honor their bodies. She focuses on modesty and women's relationships with food and their bodies.
Weisberg said the two words that come to mind when she thinks of modesty are dignity and self-respect.
For Klein, the clothing shop owner, modesty means pride and confidence. She emphasized that one can be modest and still be classy, even regal.
The women participating in this project say modesty is an integral part of their lives and how they portray themselves to the outside world. All are heavily involved in doing "chesed" (kind acts) and giving back to their community, but they don't brag about it because, they say, that would be immodest.
"You're not supposed to be 'in your face,'" said Rivkie Feiner, one of the Orthodox Jewish women involved in this project. "It's supposed to be not calling too much attention to yourself. This is who we are."
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